Have you taken time to think about preparing for the future in case something should happen to you or your spouse? There are certain subjects in our life that are taboo or forbidden, and certainly not talked about at over the water cooler at the office. Preparing for your own demise is one of these topics. It’s not often that you hear people speak with candor about how they’ve prepared for catastrophes, illness or even death. At least not at my age. We want to believe we will be around for generations. I like to think that I’ll be around to see my grandchildren, and hopefully even my grands, and dare I say great-grands? But I don’t want to be unprepared should something happen to me. Michael and I spent a few weeks last year having some really tough and uncomfortable conversations. We talked about writing a will, talked about guardians for our children, went over our life insurance policies, and even talked about our funeral arrangements. This is a subject that a lot of people avoid. It is a hard topic to discuss, let alone think about. But if you want to find out more regarding funeral arrangements, writing your will and everything surround this, be sure to do your research and talk to people who can help make this process easier. Yes that’s right, we’ve even planned what kind of funeral celebration we want. These conversations were not easy, and they took place over several nights.
Our feelings of awkwardness are moot though, considering that now I feel like we have a good solid plan in place should something happen to one of us. Our children will be cared for, our spouse will be provided for, and our family will even know what kind of bourbon to bring to our wake. Now that it’s all been put to paper I feel a sense of relief, and I’ve even been able to talk to friends about this. I am not too shy to ask people…do you have a will? Do you have insurance? Have you thought about who will take care of your children should there be a freak accident tomorrow? I hope that after reading this post you find a way to make this an open conversation in your home as well.
Preparing for the Future (my own tips & ideas):
- Invest in Life Insurance, which is often available at your place of work. This will help to make sure that your family is provided for should something happen to you. And don’t just think that the breadwinner of the family needs life insurance. The stay at home mother is just as instrumental in the family, consider the costs of replacing a stay at home mother, who plays the roles of chef, nanny, housekeeper, and chauffeur, just to name a few. Now is the time to meet with an Insurance professional and consider all of your options.
- Write a Will! Write a Will! Write a Will! I don’t care if you think you have nothing of worth to pass on to anyone, or if you just have your head in the sand and don’t believe anything will ever happen to you…everyone should have a will. We called a local attorney’s office, and they walked us through the process step by step. It started with a simple form to fill out, and ended with us having official documents that gave us peace of mind. For about $250 we now have a Last Will and Testament, Living Will and Power of Attorney should anything happen to us. Our plan is to update this every five years or so, because as our children grow and our lives change we might have things that need amending. Writing the will was no easy task, it was not accomplished in a short amount of time. We hashed and rehashed all of the details until it was perfect. I took it everywhere with me for a few days (even to Sam’s soccer practice) and read and re-read it until we were sure we were ready to sign by the x. We used DBL Law in Northern Kentucky, and I highly recommend them. They made the process much less daunting for us than I thought it was going to be, by having a straightforward process and by making themselves available to answer all of our questions along the way.
- Save for the Future: Do you have a 401K? Have you thought about retirement? I’m not going to get long winded on this subject, except to say that we have been saving for our retirement since Michael’s first day of work years and years ago.
- Discuss Organ Donation: Are your wishes about Organ Donation and Life Support known by your spouse and/or close family members? Do you have these wishes written down somewhere (preferably in a living will with your Last Will & Testament). Do you really want your family to have to make these tough choices and have to live with that decision? The decision is YOURS. Make it known! BTW..for any family members reading this, you know I’m definitely an organ donor!
- Plan your Funeral: This might not be important to everyone, we just have very specific ideas for how we want our end of life celebrations to go down. Whether it be next week or decades from now, we have talked a lot about planning this. Does your significant other know whether you want to be buried or cremated? Do you have a family crypt somewhere that you want to be interred in? Or perhaps you want your ashes in the Ohio River? It may seem unimportant, but someone needs to know your wishes, especially if your funeral arrangements will be non-traditional. And have you considered the cost? It is no secret that the average funeral cost is rising, and some families even have to turn to fundraising groups in order to pay for these costs. Additionally, it is important to note that there is insurance that can cover the costs of funerals for any family member, should it be needed. Sadly, funerals are an expensive event that can cause stress at the time of a death in the family if the funds just aren’t there to cover the costs. If you or anyone you know has unfortunately lost a loved one through something like a wrongful death, you could look into a company like Nehora Law Firm, to help you claim the compensation you deserve, following the tragedy. Families suffer when they go through times like these- from medical bills, burial costs and funeral arrangements. If this is something you want to look into, be sure to do your research and give your loved one the send off they deserve.
- Personal Touches: do you want to leave letters for your children? For your parents? Do you have family treasures that you want to give to certain people in your family? Get a pen and paper and start writing!
- Keeping the Important Papers SAFE. It’s my advice that you keep your will and other important documents somewhere accessible. You don’t want them in a place where people can rifle through them, but someone should know where they are and how to get to them should an emergency arise. Ours are not in a safe, rather we have a set kept with our attorney, and another set hidden at home. Or you could leave them with a trusted friend or family member. What’s the point of keeping them locked in a safe if nobody has access to the safe and then your papers aren’t found until it’s too late?
Have I missed anything? Do you have any tips or ideas to share with me? Please comment below!
Disclaimer: I’m not a professional…just a mama and wife who feels the need to plan and be prepared for any eventuality (you should see my zombie apocalypse plans).